Want to Live in a Start-Up Castle? You Better Meet These Ridiculous Requirements

Updated on May 24, 2015 at 12:40 PM

If you want to enter the competitive world of tech start-ups, you'd better hone your coding skills and get ready to work hard . . . and be hardcore judged on every aspect of your personal life. At the residential Startup Castle in Silicon Valley, CA, there are many arbitrary demands to meet if you want to live there, regarding everything from income to social media habits.

The massive estate, located three miles from Stanford University, offers "everything you need to live and launch your greatest ambitions," including live-work spaces, a full gym, and a 100-seat theater. The price? For a private room, it's $1,750 a month. For a shared room, it's $1,000 a month. However, earning the right to live at Startup Castle comes with a long list of requirements that might cost you your dignity.

According to an ad on the Stanford University Post, applicants "must":

Have a top-class degree or job with a strong math/science requirement
Exercise at least 15 hours in a normal week
Commute by car less than 20 percent of the time (bicycle commuter!)
Prefer organized systems and common rules
Like petting dogs

Aside from the workout requirements, that sounds pretty reasonable. After all, who doesn't like petting dogs? But the ad takes a Stepford Wives-level turn with a list of features that disqualify potential residents. "This may not be the right place for you" if any of these statements apply to your life:

Watch more than four hours of TV/movie/game entertainment per week
Have more than one tattoo
Have ever attended more than one protest
Make more than three posts a week to social media
Listen to songs with explicit lyrics more than once a day
Wear makeup more than twice a week
Own any clothing, shoes, watches, or handbags costing over $500
Have bills that get paid by somebody else
Drive a vehicle that was given to you by your parents
Get regular spending money or gifts from your parents
Have more than one Internet app date per week
Have a complex diet that requires lots of refrigerator space
Drink alcohol more than three drinks per week
Use marijuana more than twice a year
Have been prescribed anything by a psychiatrist more than once
Use any other drug more than twice in your entire life

. . . yeah. If you've got a Prozac prescription or enjoy wearing lipstick, kiss your chances of life at Startup Castle goodbye. This laughable list is so insane that we have to wonder if it's real. Could it have been a prank listing on the Stanford marketplace site? We really hope it's a joke, but considering the exorbitant cost of living in the San Francisco Bay Area, many tech employees and recent grads may find such demands reasonable in exchange for $1000-per-month rent.

Check out Startup Castle's website to see more details about life there. Maybe it's cool enough to give up Netflix and normal eating habits . . . lol.